I just spent a long weekend going to a family reunion in Illinois. This trip was about learning family history and celebrating an aunt’s 80th birthday, and what a grand achievement that is. During our visit we learned about each other’s journeys in the past and catching up in the present. For my sisters, 21-year-old daughter and I it was fascinating to learn old stories and the history of our family and extended family. There is a perspective that some members of the family have had a rough go at life even tragic, and others successful, even extraordinary and heroic. The truth is none of us are always on the upside of things in life, because there are always bumps in the road. Sometimes those highs are far and few between. How one handles the bumps I think is reflective of our character, and my family is full of colorful characters.
On the last day of our visit, I took a nature walk. After visiting my family and taking a trip into the big city, I longed for my quiet farm in Oklahoma. The nature path was a perfectly manicured chat trail with the occasional bicyclist whizzing by at what seemed like 40 miles an hour. No bumps in the road here. As I walked along the path, I discovered a fallen robin’s nest under a pine tree with a hatchling and one blue egg. The fledgling had its mouth open ready for feeding and the mother robin was making lots of noise nearby. I picked up the nest and placed it on the pine branch, just above the fallen nest, but it was not giving the nest a very good foundation. I poked around looking for where a better place might be while mother robin chirped at me noisily.
While inspecting the nest, I thought it was beautifully built! Why did mother robin not build it in a tree with a good foundation? I placed the nest on a branch in an area I thought the nest had come from and was distracted by some cyclists who were guessing what I was doing. “I think she is picking mulberries.” one said to the other. I thought to myself they would have never found this poor baby bird and nest riding a bike in such a hurry. As I turned around the nest had fallen a second time, and when I went to pick it up again, I noticed hidden in the grass, another egg that had come out from the first fall. I returned the egg into the nest and looked up at mother robin thinking, “This tree over here is better than that wispy pine tree!” Almost annoyed with her, I placed the nest in a tree across the path from the original pine tree. It was a different breed of tree, maybe a blue spruce that had webbing of old branches creating a wonderful woven structure for the nest. I moved the branches around to test the hold of the nest and was pleased with my decision to move the nest. I proceeded on my walk and on my way back, mother robin was happily feeding her hatchling in the nest’s new location.
I don't know the particulars of why the nest fell. Whatever the reason this nest fell, I assisted whether it was wanted or not. I noticed it, and therefore, I tried to help. Though during the process, there was a lot of chirping from the mother robin, in the end she was settled and seemed happy. For the rest of my walk, I got to think about how some of us know nothing about where we came from, why tragedy strikes, and feel displaced and alone. Some of us find it hard to break out of old habits and try a new perspective in life.
When we walk along the path of life, if we aren't too busy or distracted to notice, we can offer our assistance when needed in our own special way. If the job is too big to accomplish, maybe we call on a community or a network of family to help. Life is too short to go at it alone, and it is much harder to get out of a pickle by yourself. We can choose to be thoughtful, grateful, and aware of the reason you cross someone’s life path or potentially pick up where someone left off.
Learn about who you are, where you come from, what values you were taught and how you might go about things in a positive way. How are you making a positive impact in the world, however large or small? How are you continuing to learn and grow? What direction and perspective do you have? Do you have a good foundation to build upon all you want to accomplish?
Notes from an “empty nester”
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